Sunday, September 29, 2013

Don't Fly-Cry



Really? Imagine, if you would, this guy was your plumber, or your broker, or God forbid, your doctor. Your sewer is clogged. You're peeing in Zip Lock bags, your wife is livid because she can't and your kids are using the cat's litter box. Just as the man from Rotor Rooter pulls up in your drive he hears a news bulletin on his truck's radio that the latest IPPC report says with a 95% probability that global warming is man made. He waddles to your front door with his cell in hand, talking to his wife and while tears run down his face he tells you that he and his wife have just decided he is going to get a vasectomy. "Thank God for small mercies," you scream. "Get the hell out of the gene pool before you breed us all into stupidity."

Luckily Holthaus isn't a plumber, broker, doctor or anything important. He is a meteorologist. He is one of those people who told there was a 95% probability of thunderstorms on your day off so you slept late  while your friends shot their bag limit on the first day of squirrel season. One would think he would know by now, after thousands of angry emails complaining he had forecast forty of the last two severe snow storms, that climate modeling isn't what it's cracked up to be. That aside, what kind of a man emotes to such a degree to 13,000 Twitter followers? And what about the moon bat bat he's married to? If I called my wife from an airport crying about something the UN people dreamed up I would be booked into some sort of alcoholic rehab program by the time I got home.

At last the epiphany! One calculation estimates that 11% of carbon emissions come from air travel as compared to 35% that come from automobiles. Considering the number of people flying as opposed to the number of people driving that is an astounding ratio. Yes, why should Mrs. Moonbat have to contend with a washing machine that doesn't work well and stinks and a toilet that must be flushed three times per use so frequent flyer Eric can gallivant around the country, getting drunk at airports and making a damn fool of himself on Twitter? Actually I think the wife grounded his sorry ass.


2 comments:

  1. Ok, you actually made me smile. I'm thinking the guy needs to be a candidate for a Darwin Award. Of course, that requires an interesting demise of some sort, of which I know nothing and, I'm sure, our fluttery meteorologist doesn't either.

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  2. Glad I could brighten your day but Holthaus is the real comedian.

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