FLOTUS: just relax

  So this is the email Michelle Obama sent out to followers (and we do mean followers, as in, cult) of POTUS:

Not everyone knows how to prepare for a dinner like this. As someone who's eaten countless meals with my husband, I want to tell you the one thing to do if you're selected to join him... 

Just relax. Barack wants this dinner to be fun, and he really loves getting to know supporters like you. 

I hope you'll take him up on it before Friday's deadline. 

Will you donate just $3 today and be entered to have dinner with Barack? 

These dinners mean a lot to Barack. They're a chance for him to talk with a few of the people who are driving the campaign -- and a chance for him to say thank you. 

So come prepared to tell your story, and say whatever's on your mind.
Don't miss the opportunity to be there. Donate $3 or more today, before the September 30th deadline: 

https://donate.barackobama.com/Dinner 

Thanks,
Michelle

  Just relax. Barack wants this dinner to be fun...
  Ewww.
  Why does this sound so, um, sexual? Only, like, in a BAD way.
  Why do these two think this kind of language is appealing? 
  FLOTUS likes to make remarks about how "sexy" her husband is.
  And flirt in public.
  Stuff most of us don't really want to hear or see. All that smooching by Moochelle in public is unappealing.
  Really unappealing.
  But it probably works for the cultist following they've got.
  I repeat.
  Ew.