We're all disabled and bored

  (tiny whiny voice)
  Meh.
  I don't wanna take that test. It's too boring.
  And I shouldn't have to take it, because even the President says it's boring.
  So I'm not taking any tests in school. I just find it doesn't, um, challenge me. Really you're just punishing me anyway.


  This is the way to true success in America. This is the way. Our President says this (AP):

 President Barack Obama said Monday that students should take fewer standardized tests and school performance should be measured in other ways. Too much testing makes education boring for kids, he said.

"Too often what we have been doing is using these tests to punish students," the president told students and parents" [SNIP]

"All you're learning about is how to fill out a little bubble on an exam and little tricks that you need to do in order to take a test and that's not going to make education interesting."

"And young people do well in stuff that they're interested in," Obama said. "They're not going to do as well if it's boring." 

  Why should they learn how to fill in a little bubble, after all? 
  And, hey, if students had to take the NCLB tests today, 82% would fail, our Education Secretary says, so we need to....change the test! Of course!

Education Secretary Arne Duncan told Congress today that his department estimates that 82 percent of America's schools could fail to meet education goals set by No Child Left Behind this year. Duncan urged Congress to fix the law before the next school year begins so that the schools and students most at risk get the help they need. 

  So, remember, those of you who strive to have your students take and pass tests in the way they have done for the past 100 years or so, don't let the little darlings get bored. Our goal isn't so that can just fill in a stupid little bubble, after all. Our goal is that they attend school. 
  And the kiddies are getting the best education possible. How do we know this? Our Education Secretary tells us 99% of American teachers are ABOVE AVERAGE. NYT:

Students asked his opinion of teacher tenure. He said attaining it should be much more rigorous. “I think we should reward excellence,” he said. “Today in our country, 99 percent of our teachers are above average.”

Nervous laughter followed the education secretary back out to his bus. 

  99%, huh?
  Them are some pretty high standards, there, bud. 
  [Nervous laughter.]